Photo by kevindooley

No, not that kind of regression analysis, with standard deviations and charts.  I’m talking about why we personally regress back to our bad habits.  Why, after a diet struggle and weight loss, that we gorge ourselves on junk food?  Why, after pinching pennies for months, or even years, do we jump into a financing offer that we couldn’t refuse?  Why do we mindlessly waste our late-night hours surfing the internet, when we could be getting a good night’s sleep, and be ready to attack the new day?  Well, how the hell should I know?  I’ve been guilty of all three scenarios.

There’s just something about that first barbecue of the Spring.  It’s like the pilot has turned off the No Eating and Drinking sign.  When I smell those hot dogs on the grill, the reptile part of my brain takes over, and I attack those bratwurst like a hungry Komodo dragon.  I know that the food is bad for me, especially in the quantities consumed.  The Sam Adams that washes it down will never be mistaken for a whey shake.  There goes the waistline.  WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?

Strolling through Best Buy or PC Richard, I’ll spy the new big-screen, 60″, LCD HDTV.  Holy crap, 0% financing for 12 months!  I’ll take two!  But I know what will happen after the year is up, and the interest rate jumps to 18%.  But that Giants-Redskins game sure is gonna look nice.  Throw in the Blu-ray player, and we have a deal.  Who cares about the kid’s college fund?  Again, WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?

No matter how we try, it’s hard to resist temptation, to differentiate between wants and needs.  Here are the steps that I took:

The Bobby Sands-inspired Diet - For the last month, I’ve followed an eating plan that would make an IRA hunger-striker proud.  I’ve only eaten one meal a day.  This usually takes the form of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for dinner.  I’ve been taking in around 500 calories a day, if I have an apple for a snack.  It’s not the heathiest diet nutrition-wise, but I’ve dropped 16 pounds in the last 3 1/2 weeks.  It’s a drastic plan, and not for everyone.  Find what works for you.  After I’ve taken off about 20 pounds, I’ll start a sane eating plan.  Like the Metabolic Diet.  And I’ll start exercising again.

Do You Still Take Cash? - I remember when I got my American Express card after I graduated college.  I laid that baby on the table when I went out to dinner with my friends, and felt like a Big Shot.  When the bill came in the next month, I felt like a Big Douchebag.  Another lesson learned the hard way.  To resist temptation, I’ve handed over all of my credit cards to my wife for safekeeping.  I’m a cash-only guy now.  Screw the reward points, I don’t miss the monthly bills.  It gives me great satisfaction knowing that whatever I’ve paid for will be collecting no interest for Citibank to dole out to its CEO.

Lights Out! - Getting up early makes me tired at night, forcing me to hit the hay at a decent hour.  I’m now rarin’ to go when I wake up, ready to start my assault on the world with my tank full.  A reverse vicious cycle.  I really don’t miss browsing through Baseball Reference or IMDB, or Knifeforums or Equipped to Survive, in lieu of sleep.  Another bad habit bites the dust.

I’ve taken the steps to stop the vicious cycle of obesity, debt, and lack of sleep.  I’ve got a long way to go.  I’m sure that many of you do, too.  We’ll always make mistakes, but we can learn from them.  Just try not to make the same mistakes over and over again.

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