Photo by bogenfreund

There’s a type of person that I’ve always had to deal with at work.  He’s not the most punctual person in the world.  He’s not a new hire; he’s been around seemingly forever.  Look, up at the clock, he’s tardy again, it’s twenty past eight, it’s Lateness Man!

You wouldn’t believe the traffic…

Lateness Man follows his own timetable.  He gets to a meeting when it suits him.  He ignores the reminders that pop up on his Outlook calendar, if he sets them at all.  He’s generally late for work by about ten minutes, but there’s no pattern there, either.  He may arrive for work as much as an hour late.  Oh, and he’s late coming back from lunch, too.  The only time he follows the clock is when quitting time rolls around.  If he was a superhero, the emblem on his chest would be a broken wristwatch.

Full of excuses

But Lateness Man’s problem isn’t that he’s always late; that’s just a symptom.  His real problem is he’s arrogant.  His time is more valuable than yours, or so he thinks.  He’s loyal only to his own ever-changing schedule.  A frequent response from him is “I’ll be there in just a minute.” He rarely answers his phone, and doesn’t return emails.  Even when you look for Lateness Man at his desk, he’s probably not around.  He’s a human roadblock.  He’s full of excuses.  His favorite excuse for not being on time is probably “I’m so busy.”

Morale killer

Lateness Man is a high-maintenance pain in the ass.  He’s the antithesis of the team player.  He only worries about himself.  His antics drive his coworkers crazy.  He’s poison for morale.  He needs to be straightened out.  But, if his work is even marginally acceptable, he’ll probably survive another performance review, because it’s easier to keep an under-performing employee than look for another good one.

Kryptonite

But this economic meltdown has dented some of the armor on Lateness Man.  With layoffs looming, he’s started to clean up his act.  But old habits die hard, and treating the symptom doesn’t cure the underlying problem.  He’ll slip up again, and all the charm in the world won’t save him this time.  He should have read my post on how to avoid getting laid off.  But I’m sure he was too busy.

If Lateness Man gets the axe this time around, I won’t miss him.

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