I received a book for my birthday entitled, “The 2,548 Best Things Anybody Ever Said“, by Robert Byrne.  It’s loaded with quotes from famous people, and being the smartass that I am, I thought that I’d share some of the more sarcastic entries with you.  So without further ado, here goes:

There is no sweeter sound than the crumbling of one’s fellow man. - Groucho Marx

Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich. - Napoleon

Because I’m Jewish, a lot of people ask why I killed Christ.  What can I say?  It was an accident.  It was one of those parties that got out of hand.  I killed him because he wouldn’t become a doctor. - Lenny Bruce

You may already be a loser. - Form letter received by Rodney Dangerfield

When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty. - Norm Crosby

I’m glad we don’t have to play in the shade. - Golfer Bobby Jones on being told that it was 105 degrees in the shade

Bad spellers of the world, untie! - Graffito

At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote. - Emo Philips

What the hell are you looking at? - License plate slogan for New York suggested by Steven Pearl

and my favorite:

What died? - Motto for New Jersey suggested by Steven Pearl

This could also be the motto for Staten Island.  Ever drive on the West Shore Expressway?  You can feel the minutes ticking off your life as you inhale the methane gas.

Bonus sarcasm not from the book:

Every time some sonofabitch gets a hardon, it costs me money. - My father, on learning that he was invited to yet another christening

Have a great Wednesday!

Subscribe

• Earn Your Street Cred Like 50 Cent Photo by @sahxic < twitter You ain't no gangsta You'se a busta, a customer, a sucker - from You Ain't No Gangsta My two sons were arguing the other day, which isn't unusual for teenage brothers to do.  I'm just glad when they don't come to blows over a......
• Good Enough, or The Duct Tape Chronicles My father had a saying that he used frequently: "Good enough".  This he applied to everything from a concrete repair to a homemade hockey stick.  The medium my father worked in best was a type of duct tape.  It wasn't silver like the traditional kind, but rather olive drab,......
• Green Initiatives Leave Us in the Dark Photo by Tahmid Munaz â�¢ My company started a green initiative related to electricity usage.  They've installed modules that make the electric system in our building "smart".  Now, different zones can be turned off from a central location to save electricity.  This benefits both the company, which frugally cuts......

• Spotting Real Autographed Sports Memorabilia Many people get excited about autographed sports memorabilia when they find it for a good price, and as a result, many people purchase so called authentic autographed sports memorabilia without investigating the authenticity of said memorabilia. The question that all buyers should be asking when shopping for autographed sports memorabilia......
• Does low-fat on the label make you fat ? Is it possible nowadays that having something that is supposedly low-fat can indeed make you fat, some researchers at Cornell University found out that this just may be the case, they noticed that people will tend to eat more calories when they reach for the so-called low-fat type of snacks,......
• People are mad, Not Cyclists In the news currently is the case of a loony aggressive bloke who knocked a girl down on the road who subsequently died from a head injury sustained as she hit the kerb. The death of everyone is inevitable but an early death is especially hard for those closest to......