We were stuck in a conference room with no windows.  The subject of the meeting escapes my memory, but I do remember that there was a heated discussion, with a lot of profanity thrown back and forth.  I was stuck next to a loudmouth, and in close proximity to his coffee-breath ramblings.  After about an hour or so, we all called a truce and planned our next get-together.  As we compared calendars, the usual side chit-chat began.

“We’re slow.  I hope we get some new contracts in here soon.”

“I heard a rumor about a RIF.” (A RIF is a Reduction In Force in defense contractor lingo.  The rest of the world calls it a layoff)

“It’s inevitable.  I see a lot of guys standing around with their hands in their pockets.  If you have work to do, you’re not hanging around shooting the bull.”

“If they RIF anyone, it should be those marketeers.  They haven’t brought in a new job in years.”

“I didn’t see any of the afternoon regulars hanging around the cafeteria today.  I guess they got the message.”

And on it went.  Blame for our situation was assigned and reassigned.  The official memo called it “right-sizing”, but it still meant that some of my friends would no longer work there.  I remember stopping one of my work buddies in the main hallway.  He looked nervous, and told me “It doesn’t look good standing here and talking.  I don’t want to give my boss an excuse.”  He dashed off.  I felt bad for him.

I felt bad because I wanted to tell him he was already too late;  that he should enjoy the time spent talking in the hall, because soon you’ll be out looking for another job;  that it doesn’t matter now that you’re the first one in and the last to leave; that saying “good morning” to your boss in a chipper, ass-kissy way won’t matter; that not hanging around the cafeteria is futile.

It’s futile because the decision has already been made, not moments ago, but weeks or even months ago.  Managers know who their best people are.  They may be a couple of minutes late to work; maybe they’re not the sharpest dresser, or their shoes are never shined; maybe they take too many cigarette breaks; maybe they spend too much time shooting the bull.  But it doesn’t matter.

Managers will save the jobs of their best people because they get the work done.  Period.  That’s what makes them their best people.  They’ve figured out how to get their work done and thrive under the current circumstances.  If the circumstances get worse, they’re even more valuable.  They’ve shown their chops, usually under pressure.  A manager isn’t going to forget that.  If you don’t have the chops, or should I say, you’ve never shown them when they were needed, you haven’t got a prayer at layoff time.

Want to save your job?  Put in the time to become the best at what you do.  If you don’t have the skills, learn them.  Ask questions.  Become indispensable.  That’s what’s going to save your ass at layoff time.  Any last-minute cleaning-up-your-act stuff is just a Hail Mary as the clock runs down to 0:00.  Too little, too late.  Your fate is sealed.  We’ll miss you.  Good luck in your job search.

You might as well hang around the cafeteria and shoot the bull.

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