Demotivation


Anger Management poster
Photo by Thorne Enterprises

I love those demotivational posters that people create.  These are generally witty, in contrast to those lame, tired, corporate-approved motivational posters from Successories that espouse Teamwork or Attitude; the kind that hang in every director’s office in Corporate America, filled with rainbows, rock climbers, or waves crashing on a rocky shore; with trite slogans that you’re forced to stare at while your boss tells you the raise budget has been cut, and you’re lucky to have a job this year:

perserverance41jhkpgrjil_sl160_

A fine example of corporate-approved art

An unnecessary intrusion

Last week at work, some subcontractors were installing “smart” switches to control the ceiling lights.  This was during the normal workday, not after hours.  As they removed the ceiling tiles to gain access to the fixtures, they showered us with the long-forgotten filth that had settled on the tiles.  There was a mild outrage from some of my colleagues; me, I don’t sweat the small stuff.  I simply broke out the Windex and cleaned my desk.  It probably needed it, anyway.

Do you have to do that now?

I don’t want to trivialize my coworkers’ reactions.  We spend lots of time in the office, and expect to be treated as professionals.  People take pride in their work areas, and don’t appreciate a debris shower on their keyboards.  One person in particular was very upset, and took it as a personal slight.  It affected her throughout the day.  Especially after we broke her chops about being too sensitive.

It’s not that I don’t understand, it’s that I don’t care

The problem was, nobody asked if this would be upsetting.  Feelings weren’t factored into the decision.  I’m sure that while there was no malice, there was no thought of the disturbance of the work environment.  I’m sure the company was just trying to save a few bucks by having the contractors work during the day as opposed to after business hours.  It caused a hubbub that lasted for at least an hour.  I don’t know what whined more, my coworker or the maintenance guy’s heavy duty ShopVac.

Little things

See, it’s the little things at work that piss us off.  Joey Kola used to do a bit about the space program, and how we would take it in stride if NASA lost a $10 million satellite, but throw a fit if they raised the tax on beer by 5 cents.  The same thing happens at work.  Smaller raise this year?  Well, the economy is bad, at least I’m working.  Postpone my vacation?  Well, if you need me to come in, I don’t want to let the team down.  Candy machine is broken?  WHAT THE F!!  I NEED MY AFTERNOON FIX! It’s the things that don’t cost us anything that we miss the most.  If only corporations could figure that out, everyone would be happier.  The things that they need to do to motivate us won’t cost a thing.

On that note, here are some awesome demotivational posters that I’ve received in various emails from my friend, the Brightest Man in America.  Click on the picture for a larger view:

demoteamworkatt00217

demofailure

demoapathy1

demoidiocy

demodoubt

demomistakes

demomediocrity

demopessimism

demolosing

demostupidity

demoslackingatt00316

Enjoy!

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